FUNERAL SERVICE GUIDE
Funeral Proxy Attendance & Memorial Service Guide
Delivering heartfelt condolences beyond distance and circumstance. Our seasoned staff honor the departed on your behalf.
Overview of Funeral Proxy Attendance Services
Family Romance offers funeral-related proxy attendance services in four categories. From stand-in attendance at memorial ceremonies and wakes to regular grave visit services and proxy attendance at memorial services, we cover every occasion for honoring the departed.
All services are handled by professionals well-versed in funeral etiquette. Our staff are knowledgeable in Buddhist, Shinto, Christian, and other denominational customs, ensuring you can entrust everything with confidence. We carefully listen to your circumstances and preferences, then propose the ideal plan that respects both the departed and the bereaved family.
Professional
FUNERAL SERVICE GUIDE
Four Specialized Services
Dedicated staff and tailored approaches for memorial ceremonies, wakes, grave visits, and memorial services deliver the ideal farewell.
Versed in All Denominational Customs
From Jodo Shinshu, Soto Zen, and Shingon Buddhism to Shinto and Christian rites, our staff perfectly follow the incense, floral tribute, and prayer customs of each denomination.
Flexible Response Tailored to You
From sudden bereavement notices to planned memorial services, we arrange everything promptly and carefully according to your timeline.
Common Concerns
Our professional stand-in service can solve these challenges.
Too Far Away to Attend
Physical distance makes attendance impossible — living overseas or transferred to a remote area. Flight and hotel arrangements may not be feasible in time, and the costs keep adding up, leaving you reluctantly considering absence.
Work Commitments Prevent Attendance
A critical business meeting or trip overlaps with the ceremony, and taking time off is not an option. Yet you want to pay your respects. You face the dilemma of needing to act, especially given colleagues and business partners.
Complicated Relationship Makes Attendance Difficult
The funeral of a former spouse after divorce, a memorial service for an estranged relative — you are torn about whether to attend given the complicated relationships. Showing up in person feels awkward, but doing nothing leaves you with regret.
Health Issues Prevent Attendance
Hospitalization or recovery makes going out impossible. Advanced age brings concerns about prolonged sitting or travel. Yet you feel a strong desire to properly say your final farewell to the departed.
Regular Grave Visits Are Difficult
Living far from your hometown, returning for every Obon and death anniversary is a burden. You worry about the grave becoming neglected but cannot visit frequently, which weighs on your conscience.
Memorial Service Dates Conflict with Work
The first or third anniversary service falls on a weekday, and you cannot adjust your work schedule. Missing it invites criticism from relatives, but taking time off is not possible — you are caught in between.
Key Use Cases
Our stand-in services can be utilized in a wide variety of events and situations.
Proxy Attendance at Memorial Ceremonies
We attend the memorial ceremony on your behalf. Our staff dress and behave naturally according to the relationship with the departed, with incense and floral tributes handled per the denomination.
Proxy Attendance at Wakes
We attend the wake to honor the departed and warmly support the bereaved family. Participation in the post-wake meal and condolence money delivery are handled with proper etiquette.
Grave Visit Proxy Service
We prepare flowers and incense and visit the grave on your behalf. Headstone cleaning and weeding are included, and we send photos of the site after each visit.
Proxy Attendance at Memorial Services
We attend first-year, third-year, seventh-year, and other anniversary memorial services as your proxy. We maintain proper posture and etiquette during sutra chanting and engage naturally in conversation at the meal, representing you seamlessly.
Proxy Attendance When Multiple Memorials Overlap
When multiple memorial services overlap and attending all is physically impossible, our staff attend some on your behalf. We confirm the denomination and customs of each service in advance, ensuring a response that is fully appropriate and respectful to every bereaved family.
Regular Proxy Maintenance for Distant Graves
A service for regular maintenance of graves located far away. We schedule headstone cleaning, weeding, and seasonal flower offerings on a monthly or annual basis. After each visit, we send a photo report so you can check the condition of the grave from anywhere.
Recent Cases
* For privacy and confidentiality, specific event names are withheld; only service names are listed.
Loading case data...
Why Choose Family Romance
Japan's largest agency. Trusted quality.
Specialized Knowledge of Religious Ceremonies
Our staff learn denominational ceremonial etiquette through hands-on training. From the number of incense pinches to the timing of prayer and the way to hold prayer beads, every subtle gesture is attended to, ensuring attendance that feels entirely natural to those around them. Our training program is regularly updated to reflect the latest funeral industry trends.
Rapid Arrangement via Local Staff
With staff in all 47 prefectures, we can arrange local personnel even for distant funerals, keeping travel costs down while ensuring a swift response. For sudden bereavement, we leverage our regional network to the fullest to support you.
Information Security in Sensitive Settings
Funerals involve deeply personal information and family circumstances. Beyond signing confidentiality agreements with all staff, we take thorough precautions in managing request data. We share the agreed-upon backstory in advance briefings and exercise the utmost care on-site to ensure no one suspects the attendance is by proxy.
Straightforward Pricing
Each service has a clearly defined base price, and no additional costs arise after the estimate. Actual expenses for condolence money and flowers are communicated in advance, so you know the total before placing your request. Transparent pricing for complete peace of mind.
Service Details
Funerals & Memorial Ceremonies
Memorial Ceremony Proxy Attendance
¥10,000/personAttend the memorial ceremony as a friend, colleague, or relative of the departed. Incense and floral tributes adapted to the denomination. Condolence money delivery and registry signing handled carefully. Through pre-service briefing, we share the relationship and necessary details to achieve completely natural attendance on the day.
Wake Proxy Attendance
¥10,000/personAttend the wake to honor the departed while standing by the bereaved family with compassion. Post-wake meal participation is handled with proper etiquette, along with condolence money delivery and registry signing. We accept consecutive requests covering both wake and memorial ceremony, ensuring consistent and natural attendance throughout.
Grave Visits & Memorial Services
Grave Visit Proxy
From ¥15,000A continuing service for regular grave visits on your behalf. We prepare flowers and incense, clean the headstone, and weed the surroundings with care, sending a photo report after each visit. Choose from monthly plans or spot visits on specific dates such as Obon, equinox weeks, and death anniversaries. We can also bring specific flowers or Buddhist items you request.
Memorial Service Proxy Attendance
¥10,000/personProxy attendance at first-year, third-year, seventh-year, and other anniversary memorial services. During sutra chanting, we sit with correct posture following denominational customs, and at the meal we respond naturally to stories about the departed. Based on episodes you share, we prepare conversation points to blend in seamlessly as a relative or acquaintance. Offering arrangements are also available.
Start with a Free Consultation
Confidential — Nationwide — Free
Contact us via email, phone, or LINE. Anonymous consultations are welcome.
Pricing
Select a Service
Base Price
Price Simulator
Estimated Total (excl. tax)
* Transportation and option fees are separate.
* Option details and pricing vary by service.
How It Works
Even if this is your first time using funeral proxy attendance, rest assured. A dedicated coordinator will carefully support you from your initial inquiry through to the day of service.
Consultation
Share your situation via email, phone, or LINE
Plan Proposal
We recommend the best plan from our 4 services
Staff Selection
We select suitable staff based on the relationship
Contract
Payment after details are finalized No hidden charges
Day of Service
Our professionals deliver a heartfelt farewell
Client Testimonials
"My grandmother's memorial ceremony took place while I was stationed overseas, and I could not return. When I requested proxy attendance, the staff attended naturally as one of her old friends, with graceful incense offering. My cousin later told me, "A wonderful person came." I feel relieved that my grandmother received a proper farewell."
"Living 500 km from my hometown, visiting the grave monthly was physically impossible. It has been a year since I started using the grave visit proxy, and every time I receive photos of the neatly cleaned grave, I feel immense relief. They even choose seasonal flowers, and I am sure my mother would be pleased."
"I absolutely could not attend my father's first anniversary service due to work, and I was filled with guilt toward my relatives. When I used the memorial service proxy, the staff member attended naturally as my cousin. My mother told me their seated posture during the priest's chanting was beautiful, and they responded well to stories about my father at the meal. I was greatly relieved."
"When I was unsure whether to attend my ex-husband's funeral, I discovered the proxy attendance service. They understood my complicated feelings — I wanted to pay respects but could not go myself — and delivered condolence money and a bouquet as my acquaintance. I am grateful for their sensitivity to such a delicate situation."
Frequently Asked Questions
Choosing a Service
Which service should I choose?
Please contact us and we will recommend the best service after hearing your situation. Generally, for memorial ceremonies and wakes, choose proxy attendance; for ongoing grave care, choose grave visit proxy; for anniversary services, choose memorial service proxy. Combining multiple services is also possible.
Can I request both wake and memorial ceremony attendance?
Yes, we accept consecutive requests for both wake and memorial ceremony. The same staff member handles both days for consistent service. A discounted rate may apply for two-day continuous service, so please feel free to inquire.
Can I request a single grave visit?
Yes, we accept one-time spot requests. Single visits timed for Obon, equinox weeks, or death anniversaries are welcome, and you can transition to a regular plan at any time. Please feel free to consult with us.
Service & Preparation
I am anxious about my first time — how much support do you provide?
We support everything from consultation to day-of service and post-event reporting. If you are unsure about the denomination, condolence money amount, or dress code, our experienced coordinator will guide you through every detail. Please do not hesitate to ask even the smallest questions.
What advance information do you need?
Basic arrangement is possible with the departed's name, ceremony date and location, denomination, and the relationship between you and the departed. If you can share additional details such as the departed's personality and episodes, we can deliver even more natural attendance.
Can you handle grave visits in remote areas?
We cover all 47 prefectures. With registered staff in each region, local personnel handle even remote locations, keeping travel costs down. For some areas such as remote islands, please consult with us in advance.
Will anyone find out about my request?
All staff have signed confidentiality agreements, and your request details will never be disclosed to any outside party. To ensure no attendee or family member suspects proxy attendance, we conduct thorough advance briefings and exercise the utmost care on-site.
How does it work when requesting the same staff for both wake and memorial ceremony?
When the same staff handles both the wake and the memorial ceremony over two days, after the first day's wake they provide feedback to the coordinator about the bereaved family's demeanor and the ceremony atmosphere, and fine-tune their approach for the next day. For two-day engagements, we thoroughly ensure consistency in dress and backstory to avoid any contradictions. Discounted rates may apply for consecutive-day requests, so please feel free to inquire.
Can I specify the type of flowers and incense for the grave visit?
Yes, you can specify flower types (chrysanthemums, lilies, seasonal blooms, etc.) and incense brands or scents. If the departed had favorite flowers or a preferred incense, please let us know in advance and we will arrange them. If you have no particular preference, we prepare elegant seasonal flowers and standard incense on your behalf. Flower and incense costs are included in the estimate as actual expenses.
Nationwide Coverage
We have registered staff in all 47 prefectures. We can arrange local staff even for regional events.
Kanto Area
Tokyo / Kanagawa / Chiba / Saitama / Ibaraki / Tochigi / Gunma
Kansai Area
Osaka / Kyoto / Hyogo / Nara / Shiga / Wakayama
Chubu Area
Aichi / Shizuoka / Gifu / Mie / Nagano / Niigata / Toyama / Ishikawa / Fukui
Kyushu & Okinawa Area
Fukuoka / Saga / Nagasaki / Kumamoto / Oita / Miyazaki / Kagoshima / Okinawa
Hokkaido & Tohoku Area
Hokkaido / Aomori / Iwate / Miyagi / Akita / Yamagata / Fukushima
Chugoku & Shikoku Area
Hiroshima / Okayama / Yamaguchi / Tottori / Shimane / Kagawa / Tokushima / Ehime / Kochi
Media Coverage
We have been featured in numerous TV shows, films, books, and international media.
FAMILY ROMANCE, LLC
Directed by Werner Herzog. Official screening at the Cannes Film Festival. CEO Yuichi Ishii appeared as himself.
Rental x Family
A feature film based on Yuichi Ishii's book. Released nationwide in 2023.
The Human Rental Shop
A book by CEO Yuichi Ishii (published by Tetsujinsha).
NHK
Featured on multiple NHK programs. The social significance of stand-in services was highlighted.
Nippon TV
Featured on numerous news and variety programs.
TBS
Covered in news programs and documentaries.
TV Asahi
Featured on talk shows and news programs.
BBC / CNN
Covered by BBC, CNN, Reuters, and other major international outlets.
FAMILY ROMANCE, LLC
Directed by Werner Herzog. Official screening at the Cannes Film Festival. CEO Yuichi Ishii appeared as himself.
Rental x Family
A feature film based on Yuichi Ishii's book. Released nationwide in 2023.
The Human Rental Shop
A book by CEO Yuichi Ishii (published by Tetsujinsha).
NHK
Featured on multiple NHK programs. The social significance of stand-in services was highlighted.
Nippon TV
Featured on numerous news and variety programs.
TBS
Covered in news programs and documentaries.
TV Asahi
Featured on talk shows and news programs.
BBC / CNN
Covered by BBC, CNN, Reuters, and other major international outlets.
Related Services
You may also be interested in these services
Family Rental
We also serve as relatives at memorial services or attend memorial gatherings as family members.
Learn More
Wedding Proxy
Proxy attendance for celebratory occasions as well. We provide the right staff for both joyous and solemn events.
Learn More
Proxy Apology
A service that supports resolving interpersonal issues with expert negotiation skills.
Learn MoreImportant Notes
- 1Transportation costs are charged separately at actual cost (including accommodation for distant locations).
- 2Please refer to our cancellation policy for cancellation terms.
- 3Staff cannot be requested by name as a general rule, but we will consider your preferred conditions (age, gender, etc.).
- 4We cannot accept requests involving illegal activities or those contrary to public order and morality.
- 5We strictly observe confidentiality obligations and will never disclose any request details externally.
- 6Payment is accepted via bank transfer and credit card.
Free Consultation & Quote
Consultations are completely free and strictly confidential.
For urgent inquiries, please call us at {phone}.0120-949-341